This past weekend, my fiancee and I got into an argument on our way to our wedding ring workshop (which will be blogged about in a later post).
As mentioned in my first blog, I’ll admit when I’m wrong and I will apologize and make amends when I’m at fault. This past weekend was no exception. The argument was again because of some bottled up feelings I’ve been having; some more frustrations about “time”.
My asshole self thought I wasn’t getting enough time to do everything what I wanted. My asshole self wanted more. So I exploded during this argument in a way I’m embarrassed to even think about it.
So the day went on after our fight and we both made our wedding rings, picked up our daughter, went home, and proceeded getting things ready for first work day of the week.
At work on Monday, my partner says to me I look depressed and I told him my fiancee and I got into a fight and the reason I was sad at work was because I made my fiancee sad by hurting her feelings. I was sad because I made a good woman cry. I told my co-worker “I’m a fucking asshole. The reason we fought was because I am selfish. She gives me more than enough time to do everything I want and she gives me a happy life, yet I still wanted more.”
I realized the reason why I felt like I didn’t have enough time was not because I didn’t have time, but because I wanted to fill my plate with more things than I should’ve. I wanted to do EVERYTHING. I wanted to do this, do that, do more of this and so on and so forth. I didn’t prioritize and I wanted to accomplish many things. I frustrated myself. I made myself go past my own tipping point.
Needless to say I called my fiancee after work and I apologized and I admitted how much of a selfish asshole I was. I thanked her for giving me more than enough time to do the things I want to do. For giving me room to grow as a person.
There’s the saying “Happy wife. Happy life.” But I think it should be “Happy good wife. Happy great life.” When a good wife is sad, you, the husband will be sad. Not because your wife will make your life a living hell, but because deep down you’ll feel what you did was wrong and it’ll eat you up inside. It’ll weigh down on your conscience and that’s what will make you sad. It’ll make you hurt more than physical pain because the hurt you feel deep down inside is that guilt you have from hurting a good wife.
So fellas, if you have a good wife who treats you well and always looks out for your well being, don’t make them sad. Don’t be a selfish asshole. You both have needs and wants and there’s a pretty good chance she does more than enough to accommodate yours. Be appreciative. Be thankful for what you have instead of what you don’t have. Dwelling on what you don’t have will just make you greedy, selfish, and mostly, a huge asshole to your wife.